Rehab Anyone...

Rehab Anyone...

Ok I admit it.

I have tried to hide it for years but now... I admit it. I am coming clean.

I am one of those people, those very special people who... twitch their toes! I am a Toe Twitching-aholic.

It started in my infancy...  "Oh how cute" my aunties would exclaim, everyone oooo-ing and ahh-ing when I did it. The truth is... it isn't. Babies can get away with this abnormal behavior... adults even tweek the twitching toes, but a life of pain awaits.

For years I've tried to hide the fact that my toes twitch. I wear shoes. What goes on in shoes... stays in shoes. Plastic, canvas, patent or leather sheltered my feet and hid my toe twitching. I lived in fear of sandals... fearing exposure but now I'm coming out of the closet and away from the shoe rack.

It would be one thing if the world recognized that this is a disease and not a choice. It would be another thing if this was something people actually enjoyed. 

BUT no-o-o....

Late night TV shows only asks for stupid pet tricks. Daytime TV only deals with foot fetishes, while Prime time TV only shows dancing feet. The twitchers of the world are left standing out in the cold... toes twitching in helpless frustration.

In truth, I actually thought that I had outgrown my affliction. I thought that I was free of this mystery movement but late one evening, or rather early one morning, it came back to haunt me.

It was around 3 am when I awoke from a deep and rather erotic dream... screaming. Not the good kind of screaming, as from the activities of that erotic dream, but the other kind of screaming... from pain.

Seems my toe twitching caught the eye of my cat, who was a toe twitching hunter extraordinaire.

After I pried her teeth from my toe, I returned to sleep but never again did I sleep with the same sort of comfort. For in the back of my mind, amidst the cobwebs and dust of little use, I knew.

I knew that my toes would twitch again. I knew that my cat would be waiting... again.

I wonder if out there somewhere... there is a Toe Twitchers rehab just waiting for the likes of me. Who knows... maybe amidst the pain and suffering I could learn to improve my golf swing, get some autographs and meet some politicians. Hmmmmmm maybe I've been looking at this the wrong way... I could be Toe Twitching with the stars!

Rehab anyone!!!!?